If you’ve ever been to a bar and during your stay required a trip to the bathroom, chances are some patron that came before you had written something on the wall. Some bars are particularly (in)famous for their restroom scrawls, whether it’s by virtue of some particularly clever (or vulgar) remark or just for the sheer volume of it. Others, like Peabody’s, just sort of have a little, and it’ll eventually get removed. I’ve read about bar owners who meticulously follow after each bit of graffiti, but that’s understandably not how most will handle it. It’ll be there until it isn’t. In the meantime, since I spend a fair amount of time in the Ladies Room at Peabody’s, I thought maybe I’d attempt to shed some light on the current offering. 

First of all, here’s something I’ve always wondered about: Do people bring Sharpies out to bars because they know they’re going to write something in the bathroom? Is that a thing? You’d think that level of dedication would yield something a bit more creative than what you usually see, so there has to be another explanation. Do a lot of people just carry markers, usually concealed, but since I’m not one of them I didn’t know that? And then when they’re drunk they can’t help themselves from wielding it at whatever wall they’re peeing next to? Do you have a marker right now?

Okay, well, somebody did:

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Our friend here was “White gurrl wasted!!!” and she needed people to know. She needed it to be underlined. Luckily, she had a marker so she took it straight to the corkboard.

Who else visited the corkboard with their thoughts?

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In case you can’t read that, it says “Preach less, Pray more.” She says, to an untold number of complete strangers who will later visit the bar bathroom she’s currently not praying in.

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This one suggests that psychedelics will help, and I’m not here to confirm or dispute that premise. But with what? The level of certainty this person seems to have, to cross out “may” and replace it with “will,” would suggest they either have a problem in mind that eating some drugs is supposed to help with (example: Reality is awful; Get me off this thing) or they think it applies to all problems (bad example: My boss is irritated with me for being late again).

Now here’s a poor soul that forgot their Sharpie, but what they had to say was of such importance that no marker-less state was going to dissuade them. You’ll see why, I’m sure:

kua
KUA A!

Then above the chalkboard (where no one has written anything in chalk; I’m assuming it’s because the ease with which the chalk can be wiped away reminds them of their own impermanence; hence the marker clutched tightly in their fists, determined to endure) we get some fancy silver scrawls:

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<3 SMN GT THS GRL SM VWLS <3

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Yup, FOREVER. Just like you.

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